Cancer and how I fell in love with the indoor trainer

Man that title is wack. 

    My cancer journey started in 2018 while competing in the TransAm bike race - A 4200 mile cross-country challenge from Astoria, OR to Yorktown, VA. I'd just crossed over the Rocky Mountains and into the grassy plains of Montana when the severe intestinal pain and rolling blackouts started. That's what the kids call it when it hurts so bad the lights go out. The physical exertion combined with dehydration had triggered my bowels to collapse. 

I rested in a shack for four days hoping the pain would pass. It didn't, my race was over but I refused to admit it. A lovely woman named Janice found me and took me to the emergency room. Barely comprehending where I was I required immediate surgery - made it to the hospital, hope the doctor is good. 

"My guts are on the table and ready for inspection, sir."  

    When I woke from surgery I learned two fellow TransAm racers (John Egbers and T.C.) also lay in the hospital fighting for their lives, not all of us made it. At the start of the race I was at my strongest. Post surgery, I was at my weakest. I couldn't go to the bathroom by myself let alone hop on the bike. My body just wouldn't allow it, it was a burden not a vehicle. I was mentally destroyed and physically broken. But I was alive and I can work with that. I consider myself lucky. 

"Keep moving til you can't keep moving. We are all survivors until we aren't."

    There are whole stories of loss, pain and guilt here. The surgery found multiple tumors that turned out to be sarcoma a type of soft tissue and bone cancer. Treatment would need to continue beyond surgery. With scary chemotherapy on the menu I was given the title of Cancer Survivor and with it a life sentence, not a death sentence. 

    Living in a basement apartment and sleeping on a couple pallets of wood my living situations aren't always ideal. I hid in the basement isolated from the world. Chemotherapy shut down my immune system and prevented my body from healing. My scarred up legs tell stories of misadventure and abuse. Sickness is one thing but a small infected cut could be deadly. Riding outside in the city was too risky and I needed to find a way to maintain fitness while retaining my sanity. 

    The smart trainer and a small fan were set up below a tiny ground level window. The bicycle framebag held my infusion pump and IV instead of bikepacking gear. By this time all of my hair had fallen out and the breeze on my scalp felt glorious! But also served as a reminder to be careful. The drugs I was taking prevented any muscle building and my goal was base miles with no injuries, don't die.

"Take'er easy friend, don't let the guts fall out. "

    At first my rides were very low exertion. I discovered Zwift and other training platforms. I rode virtual routes on FulGaz and daydreamed of finishing my next ultra. I treated it like playing a video game or watching TV. Speaking of video games, in another life I had the 4th highest ranked Shaman in all of World of Warcraft. Probably got me cancer. 

I kept logs of my food and fluid intake/output. My body temp and heart rate throughout the day. I got a hold of every test and scan my doctors would release to me. I compared nutrition against my blood work and injuries to PET scans! My body became an experiment and the trainer was another tool I could measure it with. Combined with Zwift it held a virtual familiarity of a MMORG. Dang video games got me again. 

Post treatment, I really started putting the trainer to use. I discovered my functional thresholds and target paces. I combined breathing techniques with anaerobic workouts. Made adjustments to bike fit and concentrated on cadence and form. Unlike the road I could ride as fast as wanted without holding back. The basement was safe space to test my limits. You cannot get a big enough fan.

During the pandemic lock down my housing situation had shifted. The trainer was relocated to a dingy unfinished basement.

Hornets would come out of the walls.
It wasn't safe. 

"That gross basement was my safe connection to the outside."  

My girlfriend and I would have workout dates using TrainerRoad.

I'd hop a group ride or race with Zwift. I even used my trainer to pre-ride a virtual version of the Borrego Springs course. Which is notable now that I have the in-person course record there. 

Same bike - Same course - Less spoke cards

24hr IRL Borrego

 

Cancer aside, I'm stronger than I was in 2018. I love the outdoors, planning routes and exploring new places. And I love my indoor trainer. It will never replace my outdoor rides, but it certainly has made them easier. 

24 Hours in the Desert

We finally made it to Borrego!

Every year folks from around the world meetup in Borrego Springs, California, with the goal of putting down as many miles they can in 24 hours. Mostly matched up against top of the line aero carbon TT bikes. I did it on a steel fixed gear I used to deliver pizzas with, the All City Big Block. 

My All City in the early days. Still smells of pepperoni.

I crewed for Meaghan Hackinen during the 2019 24hour World Time Trial Championships. She's fast, amazing and I love her. Meaghan had set a new Women's course record that year and I got this crazy idea I wanted to get a record of my own. The 24hr Fixed Gear Category was the target and I already had the bike!

We both signed up the following year and I started to focus on putting down big rides on the fixed. I debated gearing and started some structured training. I even rode virtual Borrego Springs laps with an indoor smart trainer. My efforts seemed wasted when our plans for 2020 were a bust when the world got Covid and the race was cancelled. 

But that gave me another year to dial it in. In 2021 we put down some solid rides and I broke the self-supported double century barrier. My target distances were getting bigger and my technique was changing. After some fast and playful rides around the Okanagan I was ready to tackle the 24hrWorlds. Unfortunately while travelling to the event I got Covid. Meaghan and I both had to go into quarantine a week before the time trials. We were out of the race before it even started that year. Still itching to use all that built up fitness we gave a self-supported 24hr a try. It really could have gone better.  

NW Competitive Adventure trackstand!

With a couple years of lessons and failures I was ready for 2022. My original target for my age group seemed too easy now. My appetite for miles had gotten bigger. I wanted the Overall Fixed record. Joseph Lawhorn set the course record in 2017 and I was going to take it. The goal was now 415.2 miles in less than 23 hours 54 min 48 sec. But could I do it on a bike built from the spare parts bin?

I've wasted so much time drooling over frames, wheels, power meters and aero cockpits. Seeking out marginal gains where they existed and I could afford. Just to be clear, I am not wealthy. I didn't and still don't have the funds to upgrade anything new. My equipment gains came from used parts bin at Bike Farm (a commuter focused bike kitchen) or the hand-me-downs from a friend's upgrade. Seeing all the beautiful wind tunnel tested TT bikes at the start line and the riders in matching kit that must have cost tens of thousands of dollars. I'd stress over whether my All City was up to the challenge rather than if I was up to the challenge. I'd say to myself "Forget marginal gains and train for major gains.", "Don't buy upgrades, Ride upgrades.", "Whoever trains the most, Wins".  

"But let's be honest, 

Stickers make it faster 

and my bike has a lot of stickers 

so it must be fast."

24hr Fixed and Women's record holders

It's not the bike that wins races, it's the plan. I had crewed for 24hr races and a couple RAAM events but never been the show. This isn't a bikepacking event where you live off chocolate milk and gas station hot cases. This is supported and plans gotta be made. Which has a great advantage because you can get anything you need to complete your goal. You just gotta have it there and make sure your crew can make it happen for you. Days before the race we gathered supplies from grocery stores and made food schedules for lap splits. Organized all sorts of clothing and tools speculating on various challenges and scenarios.  100% up time is the goal and no second can be wasted. 

Thanks to the years of training and encouragement I received from Meaghan Hackinen and the awesome support I received from my crew members  Laurie Hackinen, Carol Wray and Randy Horton; I was able to beat the Overall Fixed course record by three minutes thirty-nine seconds!